To the left is the story of the time he swallowed a Lego
to the right she becomes engorged as her sorrow leaks
and it doesn’t drip how you’d expect, but fills space like a poison; it takes up the room in a cloud that engulfs and imbibes and imbues
Across the table is someone like me
Diagonally is someone like you

The someone like me is so vibrant,
I watch as they dance and perform
and I’m jealous, and I’m envious, and I rage –
I pout.
I internalize the simplicity
of a willful lack of doubt

The someone like me is so present
and I’m angry, and I’m exhausted, and I fade –
I withdraw.
I lose hope for the playful dignity
of a genuine ability to be raw

The someone like me, I realize
is not terribly like me at all
and the someone like you sees me collapse
as I break with the someone
who made me believe
it was possible to be strong

The someone like you is soft
That softness gives breath to my resolve
it keeps me from burning to the ground
it keeps from falling off

The someone unlike me is immune to the cloud
the sorrow takes form, not in them, but around
and the someone doesn’t cough, as all of us do
save the someone unlike me, and you
and I realize all of them are me
I swallowed the Lego and let the poison breed
I waver and stumble and remember to stand
I hold fast to any strength I can distill
and make peace with a separation impure

and I’m still in the poison; I’m still tasting the void
and the horizon is a wholeness I will conquer

Ashley Wylde
September 9th, 2015

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